The fighting feminist in me wants equality but I believe that femininity isn’t about equality but about recognising and embracing our different strengths. I am consistently flitting between between wanting to be an independent strong single traveller (boyfriend? I don’t need one of those!) and a 1960’s housewife (look what I cooked for you dear, how was your day?).
The degree to which I genuinely enjoy tasks such as tidying my home, cooking food and even doing laundry suggests that I have obviously not wandered too far from my gatherer ancestors.
Our feminine energy is often conditioned out of us by society when we are steered away from creativity, told to suppress healthy expressions of emotion, told to wear uniforms, told we should all want a ‘career’. Perhaps it is from this, that the expression ‘man’s world’ derives. As women living in a man’s world we have to work hard to block out the outside noise and follow our own hearts and intuition, be authentic and embrace every part of ourselves.
The image below is a general depiction of what it means to talk of ‘masculine’ and ‘feminine’ energy. Please note that generally within us all we have about a 60/40% balance of both depending on our gender.
Here are 10 simple ways we can embrace our feminine energy.
- Graciously accept compliments. It’s not arrogance – we all know how annoying it is when you offer someone a compliment and it gets rejected, don’t be that person. Also if you think something nice about someone, try to find the confidence to tell them. It may well make their (and your) day
- Don’t go another day wishing your body looks different. Work on truly accepting that femininity comes in all shapes and sizes. If you accept your own feminine beauty, your confidence will show and others will see it too. Love and accept your body enough to be able to look in the mirror confidently BEFORE any gym / diet plans. Listen to external compliments (as above) but don’t rely on them to feel good. Start paying yourself compliments!
- Try a goddess meditation. Any meditation will help you connect with yourself which in turn will increase the connection with friends, family and partners. Try this short quiz to consider how connected you feel right now
- Learn how to express yourself assertively. Getting your point across doesn’t have to be an aggressive confrontation nor do you have to put up with your boundaries being crossed. Don’t expect people to mind-read. If you don’t make someone aware of your boundaries then it is unfair to moan about their behaviour behind their back
- Get creative. Creativity is a feminine attribution (see above picture). Get into more art, dancing, painting, whatever you feel connected with.
- Stop reading this for a few seconds. Identify how you’re feeling right this minute. Work on dealing with your emotions as and when they come up rather than brushing them away and distracting yourself. From experience they will ALWAYS come out eventually so better now rather than next month with a load of others surfacing emotions!
- Check the hormones you are putting into your body if using any long term contraceptives. How can we really know for sure we are truly ‘ourselves’ if these hormones are going into our bodies every day. Check out this short book review video of ‘Taking charge of your fertility‘. Also check the hormones in meat you are consuming.
- Research fluoride in toothpaste and water and its effect on suppressing our pineal gland which effects our sleeping patterns, sexual desire, biological clock, weight gain, thyroid, moods and mental health and spiritual awareness
- Monitor your internal and external ‘bitchiness’. If you’re judging another woman there is a strong chance you could be rejecting a part of yourself at the same time. E.g. if you judge another person for being unreliable, is it possible that you sometimes feel guilty for being unreliable yourself? Once you stop judging others, believe me you will notice that you will begin judging yourself less!
- Keep your heart open, stay vulnerable. Strength is not in keeping everyone at bay, but at staying vulnerable and open to new possibilities for growth and love even when it isn’t always reciprocated (from partners, friends or family) in the way you would expect.
Men are from Mars Women are from Venus, John Gray